Category Archives: blindness

The Little Ways…

12 Friday Feb 2016

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I threw a post to my twitter followers last week, asking for ideas for “fringe benefits” of being blind. everyone thinks of the obvious ones – boarding airplanes first, for example – but there are others. Someone sent me this list, and while some of the pointers are funny (I will cover them here), others missed the mark so thoroughly that it feeds into the stereotype that blind people don’t care about being independent or what they look like to others.

 

But I refuse to go on a rant on this subject…. so a la Tommy Edison, here are some awesome benefits of being blind:

  • If you read braille, even as a kid, you could read in the dark and your parents never found out
  • The term “lights out” meant nothing to you (for my totally blind friends)
  • You find out later that the person guiding you somewhere is immensely attractive (yes, this happens)
  • On long road trips, you never have to drive! (in my case, I hand the driver food…)
  • No one ever asks your opinion of the haircut they’re pretty sure is hideous…
  • You’re everyone’s favorite person during a power outage
  • You have TONS of ways to communicate; those “poor sighted people” seem to use visual cues most of the time
  • You never have to buy a TV for the picture quality
  • You can feel like a secret agent because you can operate a cell phone with the screen curtain on
  • If you have a guide dog (well-behaved, of course) you can bring them everywhere
  • You can hook up bluetooth headphones and “watch” movies through audio while simultaneously taking the dog out, doing laundry, and making dinner

On a serious note, as frustrating as blindness is sometimes, the support of others is amazing. Blindness has enabled me (and many others I know) to meet terrific people – sighted and blind – that I never would have met any other way. Whether it’s sharing cooking or fashion tips, providing accessible tech support options that don’t include a mouse, or simply listening and “getting it” on the occasions where blindness seems like the most frustrating part about your day, this community is one of the other best things about being blind.

 

How about you? What are some self-affirming and positive benefits you’ve found about being blind?

 

If you’ve enjoyed this post (or any others), please consider buying me a coffee… because life is better with coffee.

No more School, No more Books…?

06 Saturday Feb 2016

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A few weeks ago I had the opportunity to take part in a podcast regarding the education of blind children. At almost the same time, I found this radio documentary about whether the advent of technology is taking away the need or relevance for braille. Since it’s quite clear where I stand on the braille issue, I wanted to tackle the education questions, since (for some reason I’ll never understand) it is not infrequently assumed that all blind students attend special schools.

 

I’ve outlined briefly my educational background here; as is obvious, I was mainstreamed through my entire school history. All of my blind friends (few though they were) were mainstreamed, as Canada at the time only had one or two schools for the blind, and they were both in eastern Canada. It wasn’t until I was eleven or twelve before I spent a large amount of time with anyone who attended a school for the blind (in the US); even today, many of my friends were mainstreamed, and even those who attended a school for the blind for brief or extended periods have described many practices that would be decried by any civil rights organization (belittling treatment, lowered educational standards, etc.) While I realize this is not the case for all students at all schools for the blind (I’ve heard anecdotally how empowering such schools can be in Europe, as opposed to many in the USA and Canada), I’ve heard enough about it to cause me some concern. Instances like lowered expectations for totally blind students, allowing those with more vision to learn more skills than their totally blind classmates, not allowing those who took some mainstream classes to associate in any way with those “public school kids”… these all make me die a little inside. Even listening to some of the recorded portions of the documentary above, I cringed at the way some of the teachers talked to their students, as though they were much younger than teenagers.

 

But I cannot disagree that some students can find separate schools incredibly helpful. many smaller communities may not have the resources and facilities to assist blind students in the way that best suits them. Sometimes sighted peers will bully a blind classmate, and being in a place where they are not viewed or treated as “different” can make the difference between graduation and dropping out. If there are additional disabilities involved, a school for the blind can sometimes have the resources that a public school may not. Life skills that a public school may deem “too dangerous” or unsuitable for a blind student (cooking, workshop, etc.), and parents are unable or unwilling to teach these skills themselves, a separate school can sometimes provide such training and prepare the student to cook, clean, and perform other life tasks as a blind adult. even among some who attended schools for the blind under some of those circumstances, I’ve heard far too many comments along the lines of “They may have educated me in braille and technology and some life skills, but they nearly broke my spirit.”Many life-long students of such schools are never broken of bad habits that are socially unacceptable among sighted peers; mainstreamed kids learn (sometimes in harsh and cold ways) that such behaviors aren’t OK. I don’t think segregation is the best way to educate blind students, as it can perpetuate a certain “otherness”, but many of the resources of such institutions can be incredibly helpful for mainstreamed students who are struggling in school. I don’t have all the answers to these questions, but maybe it’s important to start a dialogue.

 

One thing that does concern me about schools for the blind might not be related to the education itself. Any job applicant is required to prove to an employer that they graduated from high school; including “_____ School for the Blind” on a resume will automatically “out” an applicant as blind right out of the gate. This doesn’t allow an applicant to allow their resume to stand on its own, with skills, talents, work and volunteer experience; Such schooling, just based on the name, will automatically show an HR manager, company CEO, or whoever looks at that resume, that the applicant is blind. Despite legislation prohibiting discrimination, like it or not, discrimination against people with disabilities still exists, particularly when it comes to employment. Why give hiring managers preconceived notions – right or wrong – about us as applicants?

 

I realize that I’m framing many of my thoughts from a western point of view, where blind people wish to be held up as equals to their sighted families, fellow commuters, and (many of whom) wish to maintain employment with mainstream organizations. But what about countries where societal views of blindness are not as supposedly enlightened as our western ones? What if blind students simply wish to… survive? Should we throw the baby out with the bathwater and assume that organizations such as this or that in developing countries shouldn’t exist, because, by gosh, we have rights? Are baby steps in the right direction still… well, in the right direction? Are abuse, deprivation, and family suspicion better than having a safe place for the blind, even though many such residential facilities offend my western sensibilities? Again, I don’t have the answers, but I have many many questions. Last week, I read a book about one of the organizations I referenced earlier (I do plan on reviewing it in full once I mentally process it further); I was touched by the empowerment many of the blind students at these schools felt, maybe for the first time, and yet dismayed by some of the childish and socially awkward behavior that was described. Does the presence of one negate the need to address the other? Or is what matters most the fact that these students are educated, whatever the cost?

 

Whether east or west, mainstream or separate,I  think what matters is that we are educated to be as productive as we can be. I don’t wish to only indicate what separate schools for the blind are doing wrong while praising mainstream schools, because even if I was very fortunate, I realize there are holes in that system as well. Ultimately, it comes down to us, and the power we choose to give to those around us, and I think that’s what concerns me most: as a blind child, you hear so many mixed messages, and you don’t have the mental maturity and life experience to discern truth from a lie. One teacher says that you’ll NEVER succeed at something because you can’t see, while another treats you like you’re a toddler; one shows you how to dissect that biology project, while another refuses to acknowledge your awkward behavior and help you improve it. At the end of the day, the best teachers are the ones that empower without condescension, push without bullying, and confront the hard stuff of life without pity. Those teachers are found in all schools, but are sadly all too rare… perhaps I’m lamenting education as a whole.

Your “Inspiration” doesn’t Pay my Bills

31 Sunday Jan 2016

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I’ve been on the job hunt for almost a month now. It’s a very different economy from the one I saw three years ago when last seriously looking for work. Like many people, I have experience and skills; the biggest challenge I’ve found (and I am not alone) is getting call-backs for interviews.

The following statements are my own preference, based on my own experience of work, resumes, and interviewing; not everyone will share this opinion. I don’t ever pre-disclose my blindness to prospective employers unless absolutely necessary. In my opinion, it has little to do with my ability to do the job itself, and I choose not to give my interviewers any opportunities to walk into that interview room with preconceived ideas about my capabilities. The idea is, if the job posting indicates that my skills and qualifications fit, I send in an application just like everyone else; I wouldn’t apply for a job looking through microscopes or driving a truck. Sometimes this has worked in my favor; my resume has stood on its own, and my solid work history and a successful interview has landed me a great job. Other times, I learn when I get there that there are truly visual job duties that were not indicated on the job posting, in which case I choose not to assign blame. Other times, I get turned down for the job because… um…?

I recently ran into a situation (though not for the first time) where I was graciously turned down for a job post-interview. I was told that my skills and qualifications were solid, but that there were some job duties that posed a safety risk to myself and my guide dog. There actually was a legitimate case for this, so I chose to be gracious in reply… until I read the part that said my attitude and qualifications were inspirational, and the hope was that I would find a position somewhere else.

Guess what? If I wanted to be inspirational, I’d go on the motivational speaking circuit. I am looking for a job, something that can use my skills and background, where employer and employee have a functional relationship, both being realistic about the capabilities of an employee with a disability, making reasonable efforts on all sides to be accommodating. Seriously, it’s not that hard. People just have to get over the fact that I wish to be taken seriously, and actually want to work for a living, and my resume proves I have the chops to do it! I took to twitter to vent, but I never expected my little tweet to gain such traction (as of this posting, it had 50 retweets).

There are many noble causes out there aiding people with physical or developmental disabilities, those struggling with mental illness and/or poverty. What few people understand is that people with physical disabilities want to work, to be taken seriously in the classroom, boardroom, or salesroom. The more we get treated like token inspirations, the more likely we are to become recipients of aide due to poverty and mental illness. Very few well-known figures who advocate for social change and social justice due to race or gender or other protected grounds even touch on disability. Why is that? Don’t they understand that the more we get shuffled off as “someone else’s problem”, the more likely we are to get sick and tired of just being pushed aside?

In the meantime, I choose to fight, because someone, somewhere, will give me the opportunity to use my skills and background, who will take me seriously as a job applicant. It’s happened before, and it will happen again. But I have a few tough questions for social justice warriors on both sides of the disability continuum: For those who don’t acknowledge our needs at all, and choose to address discrimination based on race, creed, or gender (legitimate grievance, to be sure), why is this the case? We face more discrimination on a daily basis than many of those for whom you are fighting. For those advocating on behalf of the disability community: why is employment not front and center in many of your mandates? In my opinion, meaningful employment is quite possibly the only thing that gives those of us who wish and are able to obtain it the dignity and self-respect we so desire. And for those employers who shuffle me and others like me off, telling us we’re so inspirational for coming to the interview? Guess what: I am not someone else’s problem, and your inspiration doesn’t pay my bills.

On Personal Autonomy: No means No!

23 Saturday Jan 2016

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I’m probably preaching to the choir with this post, and if I’m not, it’s even more important that you read it. I’ve seen enough of this attitude lately that it’s time that I tackle this head-on. People with disabilities are not here on earth to be your good deed of the day, to inspire you just for getting out of bed in the morning, to have our privacy violated on social media, to answer all of your personal questions, to allow you to pet our service dogs… either without being asked at all or having our “no, thank you” or “please don’t” be completely disregarded in the name of accepting generosity and not hurting anyone’s feelings. And lest anyone think that I’m being too harsh, it’s not my intent in any shape or form. But I’ve come across a large number of articles over the past couple of weeks that have addressed aspects of this on a smaller scale… so it’s obviously not just me.

 

It started with this article. While I do take exception to the author’s tone (which I did find incredibly angry), if you read beyond it he has a lot to say about personal space and the right to say no. For some reason I have never understood, I have found that many people with disabilities seem to be commodities for public consumption. We’re out in public, so someone grabs our arm to guide us somewhere with no idea where we’re going, even if there is no reasonable inference that we require their assistance other than the fact that we’re blind and it must be so! In recent conversations with people who use wheelchairs, more than once someone has grabbed the back of their chair and propelled them into position at a grocery line or to a table at a restaurant, even if they declined the offer of assistance or were never asked at all. And I’m pretty sure I’m just scratching the surface of variables of disability, public reactions, and responding to unnecessary “generosity”.

 

It is possible to decline offers of assistance graciously when they are unnecessary, even if we believe that they are so outlandish as to be demeaning. A “no, thank you” can generally go a long way. But what if it doesn’t? Is it my responsibility to graciously receive assistance I don’t require if it’s being forced on me? Am I supposed to answer all intrusive and personal questions because someone dares to talk to me in public and wishes to learn the ins and outs of my disability? The answer to these questions is generally no, unless of course I truly wish to do so. I’d like to think I have a pretty good read on people, and a pretty good system of dealing with the genuinely curious, the downright nosy, and the grabbers. But that’s hardly the point; when I say “no, thank you”, I expect that to be honored just as it would be – or should be – from any able-bodied person.

 

But when people take pictures without consent – or, worse, post them on the Internet, I shouldn’t have to be gracious about that. Above, I linked to Carly’s post on the topic, and she can address the social media aspect better than I could. But on a personal note, this disturbs me and angers me, largely because many blind people can’t see it happening, and even those that can may be unable to address the “photographer” directly. Last year a friend and I were on a train with our guide dogs, and someone across the way from us was taking a picture. We couldn’t tell for sure if it was of us and our guides, but it was in our general direction, and we didn’t overhear anything at all related to asking or indicating a picture was being taken. So we started talking really loudly about how rude it was that photos were being taken on the Subway, etc. We didn’t get any reaction from across the aisle, but I hope our point was made.

 

This all being said, it is so important for all of us – those with disabilities and those without – to be respectful if at all possible. Please don’t let this post put off anyone from asking if we require assistance, but simply to ask rather than assume. If we say yes, please don’t rub our faces in it about how great it makes you feel that you’re helping us; if we say no thanks, please honor that. For my blind/visually impaired readers – as much for myself – even if assistance is offered and not required, please take a deep breath and thank the person for the thought; I have found myself getting defensive sometimes when the sixth person in a day asks if I need help – they don’t know all that’s gone before. For my sighted readers, please tread carefully when asking personal questions about someone’s disability (the cause, the level of hearing/vision/mobility they have); the phrase “If you don’t mind my asking” goes a long way. To readers with disabilities, there’s no shame in politely stating that those questions are personal and you don’t wish to discuss them, but what about sports/music/movies? People question what they don’t know, so to them the questions are natural even if to you and me they are intrusive; they may think they have the right to ask them, but we have the right to keep whatever information about ourselves private.

 

Above all, please please please keep your hands and your camera to yourself. Many of us blind folks do know where we’re going and are using that post/garbage can/wall/doorway to navigate and orient ourselves; grabbing us away from such things may actually get us more lost than simply telling us “Just so you know there’s a wall ten feet in front of you.” Unless we are in immediate danger of getting hit by a car or falling down a flight of stairs, there’s no urgent need to reach out and grab us without warning. And we’re not zoo exhibits to show your friends on Facebook pictures of that “amazing blind girl at the mall yesterday, like, out in public and everything!” Trust me, my guide dog LOVES pictures. If you ask nicely, I might even let you pet her before your photo shoot…

Don’t Fire your Employees!

15 Friday Jan 2016

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Yesterday this post made national news, and many guide dog users praised the city of Calgary and/or the cab company for firing this driver. Having seen (though not truly experienced) this situation many times, I’m not sure I am completely comfortable with this resolution…

 

The situation is not unfamiliar to many guide dog users: a taxi driver, store clerk, mall security officer refused access to a person with a disability accompanied by a service dog. In this case, the whole incident was captured on camera, and the driver was fined $750 and lost his job for refusing access. Such incidents are not uncommon, but appear to be less common than they used to be (according to many long-time guide dog handlers I know). According to the Alberta Service Dogs Act, the financial penalty is within the limit of the law. But human resources decisions are made by companies, and I wish them to reconsider their stance on firing employees who for the first time refuse service to passengers or customers with service dogs.

 

Don’t get me wrong – I understand the implications. An employee has represented your company badly and clearly broken the law. The provincial government’s financial penalty should have teeth, but making this a job-costing offense doesn’t serve your company or the employee who is fired, nor does it in the long run serve those who rely on service dogs. Such swift action tells the employee that his actions were wrong, but it doesn’t give them an understanding of why it’s wrong. I also firmly believe that it doesn’t give other employees an opportunity to learn from the experience, except for sending the message that “they need to provide service or lose their job.

 

I propose a different remedy:

  1. The financial penalty as outlined by Alberta law.
  2. A written reprimand in the employee file. If the employee in this case is licensed by the city, the city should receive a copy of such a reprimand.
  3. A probationary period (the length of which is at the discretion of the employer/city); If the access refusal happens again, THEN fire them. At least in that instance, they can’t say in any certain terms they didn’t know.
  4. Strongly encourage such employees to volunteer with service dog organizations. I firmly believe that many of these instances are based on a lack of education on what these dogs do. Their presence can provide a disabled person a degree of dignity that refusing access strips away. Maintaining volunteer relationships with service dog organizations may provide an opportunity for service providers to learn first-hand the work that’s involved in training these dogs.

 

This does not address the very real concern of allergies, because such an issue has already been addressed. It is made very clear that if someone is allergic to dogs, reliable documentation must be provided to the employer, and all efforts must be made for the safety and access of both the disabled person accompanied by a service dog and the employee or service provider with allergies. The above suggestions are for employees who for the first time refuse service to a service dog team.

 

In no way am I saying that such behavior is acceptable; I am simply saying that education goes a lot further than lowering a hammer. If an employer wishes to fire an employee for breaking the law and representing their name badly, that is their decision. But please don’t do it in my name.

Speaking in Tongues: On Language, Learning and Literacy

04 Monday Jan 2016

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I don’t know who comes up with these, but many organizations dedicated to blindness celebrate January as National Braille month. Louis Braille was born on January 4 in 1809 and invented the alphabet that became the basis for the current system of dot combinations that enable blind people all over the world to read. He died tragically young, but his legacy has lived on for all of these years. In addition to Latin languages (English, French, etc.) there are braille systems for Japanese, Chinese, and Korean, as well as many other languages that enable blind children and adults to not only read and write for themselves, but contribute to society at large.

 

I learned how to read braille at the same time my schoolmates were learning to read print – perhaps even earlier. My vision was such that I could read very large print and see pictures in books or on TV, but using it for long periods gave me massive headaches. So at the age of four or five, I started learning braille, which allowed me to continue my schooling uninterrupted when I realized that one of my many eye operations robbed me of most of the sight I had left. I initially learned to write using a Perkins brailler, and then was forced to learn using a slate and stylus – something I hated at the time, but am eternally grateful for now.

 

As a child, I thought every other blind student learned to read and write braille in this way, but I have learned that many are not being taught braille at all, due to the prevalence of screen reading software. Many of those that are taught to read may not be taught to write braille, since typing on a computer is so commonplace. While audio feedback and learning has its place, I believe there is no substitute for learning proper spelling, grammar, and sentence structure, and for those with little or no usable vision, I believe braille is the only way to achieve this. In no way am I saying that everyone needs to be perfect at it (I’m sure Meagan and others can find six mistakes in my first few paragraphs), but even sighted learners using a tablet or a smart phone have a visual concept of spacial relation, grammatical correctness, and even spelling (with or without the aide of a spellchecker). I believe the lack of braille teaching (with hard copy paper or with an electronic braille display) will ultimately put blind children (and later adults) at a disadvantage, because it is extremely hard to learn basic language concepts without being able to “see” them. I should know; I have learned three languages in addition to English, and could never have succeeded as well as I did, particularly with French, had I not been able to “see” proper spelling of words (those silent “e”s would have killed me).

 

Braille has made me the person I am today. I am literate, articulate, and play a mean game of Scrabble. While I do listen to audio books and use a screen reader to access a computer, I am eternally grateful that at eight years old I was all but glued to a chair and forced to learn that slate and stylus; who wants to carry around the braille equivalent of a Smith Corona? From a practical standpoint, having a secondary way of processing information (a braille display) proved incredibly helpful on an occasion where my computer’s sound card was fried and I had no access to my screen reader at all for several days! Buildings with elevators that don’t have braille signage can send me to the wrong floor; now imagine that in every single elevator because no one took the time to teach you how to read numbers? Not everyone will agree with me, but I firmly believe that those little dot combinations are one of the few things that can help level the playing field. Look up “Braille Literacy” and many organizations will correlate braille literacy with academic achievement and employment. So maybe it’s not just me…

2015 – The Top Posts

31 Thursday Dec 2015

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I’ve always loved year-end countdowns. When I was growing up, I used to have the radio – that old contraption that made you wait for your favourite song – on every New Year’s Eve (or New Year’s Day for reruns) and listen to the top songs of the year. Sometimes it was great to think about the music that maybe was really popular at the beginning of the year, but forgotten in the ever-present push for new popular songs.

 

In the spirit of such countdowns, and with many new readers to my blog this year, here are the top five posts of 2015 on Life Unscripted:

 

#5: “You’ll burn the House down!”

This one surprised me, especially given my recent injury involving a knife and green peppers and a trip to the emergency room. I still have all ten fingers, my hair is still long, and my house is still standing… so I guess this blind chick is still allowed in the kitchen 🙂

 

#4: I will never Ask to Hold your Baby

By far one of the most emotional blog posts I have ever written. Judging by the comments I have received, I am by no means alone in my hesitance, and yet if I don’t ask I don’t receive…

 

#3: All blind People should Have a Guide Dog

I have no shame in acknowledging that my tongue-in-cheek approach was purposeful… but even I had no idea the reach of this post. I actually expected this post or this one to do just as well… proves what I know!

 

#2: I’m a bad ____, but It’s Not because I’m Blind

Of all the blog posts I’ve written this year, the success of this one has surprised me the most. I am not sure why, but it just did.

 

/1: “So, Like, he takes care of you!” or…?

A blog post about relationships seems to always get people talking. Disability and romance is definitely a touchy subject. Whether one or both parties have disabilities, there is a certain otherness that characterizes such relationships. How I wish this wasn’t so…

 

Here are a few honorable mentions – popular posts that didn’t quite make the top five, or a few personal favorites of mine:

 

  • Advocacy is a touchy subject, but it is so important.
  • Another relationship post nearly made the cut.
  • Who knew that such a little hashtag could nearly blow up twitter?
  • Maybe I should have left this topic alone?
  • I loved getting to know these lovely ladies a bit better this year.
  • Not long ago I had a discussion regarding independence; it brought this post to mind.
  • In honour of New Year’s Eve, I will probably be asking more for the drink, not the tool from my human friends…
  • Just for giggles… in the deep of winter, it’s just plain fun to think about camping!

 

None of these posts would be possible without you, my readers. Those I know in person and online, who comment through the blog, facebook, twitter, and email, who give me great ideas for posts… I thank you all! All the best in 2016!

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

24 Thursday Dec 2015

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Today is December 24. From what I’ve experienced myself, and what I’ve seen on social media and heard around town, it really hasn’t felt like Christmas this year. Maybe it’s the weather – we didn’t get any real snow until a couple of weeks ago – or just the general feeling of the year, but I am definitely not alone in feeling a bit disoriented that tomorrow is December 25.

However you choose to celebrate the holidays – in churches or synagogues, with family and friends, with gifts or parties, or just wanting to avoid them altogether – there is no denying that there are certain seasonal treats to enjoy. From lights in store windows to carols on the radio to all of the food that’s consumed… it all got me to thinking that the holidays are truly a multi-sensory experience for everyone. Bells can be heard everywhere, the scents of great food and hot wintry drinks fill the air, trees big and small are decorated simply or elaborately… and you don’t have to be blind to feel, shake, or otherwise try and guess at what those presents are.

But I also got to thinking… isn’t a blind person’s life always lived this way? Sure, there aren’t bells ringing in May, and no one’s drinking hot apple cider in July (in this part of the world, anyway). But the holiday season (for some reason) seems to be the only time of the year when no one comments how sorry they are because I can’t see. Ask the same person in July, and they’ll tell you that they feel bad that my life is so colourless. But is that really true?

Those of us who can see some light can use the sight we have to navigate (to whatever degree we can), and definitely use our other senses to explore the world around us. I’ve advised people before in a previous blog post to walk into a bead shop and hold the strands of beads in their hands. How about going to a hockey game and taking note of the scent of the ice? And everyone enjoys good food and good music…

Christmas (if you’re politically incorrect; the holidays if you’re not) is a wonderful time of the year, whether you celebrate it for religious, familial or personal reasons. Even those of my friends who don’t celebrate really enjoy the food and drink you can only seem to get this time of the year. So while you’re sitting down to your holiday dinner, all of those senses that seem to be brought to the forefront this time of year… we use them every day, and perhaps after all there is something magical about that…

“So… what does that do?” – On Assistive Technology

13 Sunday Dec 2015

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For some reason I still don’t understand, a previous blog post generated a really lively discussion at a school for the blind far far away. I appreciate that this blog has readers from many backgrounds, ages and countries, and love that my opinions can open the door to some great conversations. One of the topics of discussion was regarding assistive technology (those braille/talking/large-print things that make many blind peoples’ lives so much easier). Stemming from that, when is it appropriate to be “treated like everyone else” and there by not receive any accommodations), and be protected and coddled so much that we aren’t required to advocate for ourselves at all?

 

Reading about this discussion, I took a trip down memory lane. As with all technology over the past 15-20 years, assistive technology ( braille displays, screen reading software, scanning applications) has grown in leaps and bounds. When I was in school, I used a Perkins brailler (think like a 25-pound braillle typewriter, which was as heavy and noisy as you’d think), a slate and stylus for on-the-fly braille writing, and a specialized notetaker (like a bad version of today’s tablets without a screen) called a Braille ‘n Speak to type out assignments. Computers took up lots of space and had to be pre-loaded with specialized text-to-speech software to run on the limited accessible programs available (my first laptop ran only Word Perfect and a braille transcription software so I could print out assignments). A transcriber had her own office and brailled my worksheets, tests, and books unavailable through provincial/federal resource centers – by hand in the early days, by scanning into a computer and printing them out on a big noisy braille printer when the technology was more readily available. Any assignments I did using braille, she had to write above the braille so my teachers could read them. Needless to say, while my work got done, I was far from being treated “like everyone else”; it took a small army and my own special room to get through elementary and high school. Now that I write this out, I owe a HUGE debt of gratitude for those who tirelessly did this work, so THANK YOU!

 

Over the years, technology has evolved. While specialized equipment such as braille displays, screen reading software, and braille printers are still on the market, many aspects of technology have been made more readily available to the general public. Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software is available inexpensively or free of charge, so scanning documents to read them can be done by almost anyone, sighted or blind. Some screen reading software (which reads the content on a screen in a synthesized voice) is available pre-installed on computers, smartphones and tablets; other options are available for purchase or free of charge, which leaves the market wide open to choose which software works best for a particular individual. High schools and colleges have teachers and professors emailing their assignments to students, and students being able to email them back; if a blind person needs to print out hard copy, printers are readily available at the local Staples for less than the cost of a microwave.

 

We are at a time when technology has opened up many possibilities, and yet it has closed doors in other ways. Even as I have been writing this post, I’ve seen tweets describing an experience buying groceries and having to ask for assistance because the debit pin pad is a touch screen with no spoken menus and no tactile buttons, or a customer wishing to contact a company but being unable to because of those distorted images on the screen that a screen reader cannot read. When is what we are asking for too much? When does requesting accommodations make us “more valued” than anyone else? For me, personally, it comes down to dignity and respect. I want to be able to go about my day as a consumer, an employee, a student, a patron just like everyone else. Yes, I use specific technology to make that happen, but it has come through figuring out what works for me, and has put me on more of an even footing than I have ever been. Technology can be the great equalizer, providing access to information, employment possibilities, education and commerce; making that equalization possible should be the responsibility of all of us – individuals, institutions, businesses and governments. If I ask for accommodations, it is something that will benefit not only me, but other customers in that store, other students at that school (either currently or in future), other employees in that office. Perhaps it looks like purchasing that screen reading software will benefit only that one student in the classroom, but in effect, it benefits everyone by giving that student an opportunity to learn and engage and educate the others.

 

So, while technology grows at a rapid rate, ask the questions, request what you need. If it can improve your access to information, employment, education or commerce, ask the tough questions. Ironically, what can be viewed as “special treatment” may be the only thing that will allow you to be treated equally. If we all stay silent and hope someone will come along and make our lives better, we’d wind up with such advanced technology as this… I think we’re a bit past that, no?

I will Never Ask to Hold your Baby

03 Thursday Dec 2015

Posted by in blindness

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***Blogger’s note: It was kindly pointed out to me that a previous edit of this post identified certain individuals and situations. This was not and never has been my intent, so I have removed any identifying information. Thank you for reading and commenting.

 

One day last week, all conversation stopped when an infant was brought into the room. Four women cooed, passed around and fussed over the baby. I was about to open my mouth and ask if I could hold her when I was asked, “Would you like to touch the baby while someone else holds her?” My heart sank. I wanted more than anything to ask if I could hold the baby, but words just wouldn’t come out. Even thinking about it now, nearly a week later, I regret not asking the question, even as I realize that a large piece of me feared that the answer would be no.

 

I have friends with children, some of whom I have known since they were infants and who are now approaching double digits in age. Looking back, I doubt I have ever initiated a baby-holding experience; I would be asked if I wanted to hold the baby or, in one memorable instance, had a baby unceremoniously plunked in my lap. I don’t have an exact reason why this is, but I know a piece of me feels like the world would end if I were to ask to hold a baby and was told no, that’s OK, or – perhaps even worse – miss the horrified or awkward or mistrustful glance that would accompany a hesitant, “OK.”

 

And yet, one day, I wish to be a mother. It’s been my dream for as long as I could remember. Several jobs ago, I thought I would stay at that job until I became pregnant and went on maternity leave, but life had other plans. Over the past few months, through all the changes that have gone on in my life, I have thought more about motherhood. What about being pregnant? Would I have to respond graciously to such insensitive questions like “Where’s the father in all this?” or “Are you allowed to have a baby?” or “Are you going to keep it?” And that’s BEFORE giving birth! My biggest fear is having social workers involved in my parenting because of a perception that a disabled parent can’t take care of an infant (think that won’t happen? Think again).

 

Even a basic call-out to blind friends has produced heartbreaking fear and misconception of childcare capabilities expressed by family members, friends of friends, and strangers. More than one blind father has had store employees thank their 4-year-old for “taking Daddy to the store”. One friend (the go-to “Cool” babysitter of the neighborhood) had one family refuse to have her look after their children unless a sighted (read: capable) person was with her. Another was told that his child was invited to a birthday party… only if a sighted parent brought them. And those were just the stories I heard in the span of about thirty minutes, with more comments of “Don’t get me started; I’m talked to like I can’t POSSIBLY take care of myself, much less a child.” My heart grieves for a world where this is so.

 

So for those who have children, I don’t wish to come across awkward and uncertain, but in fact I really am. My arms ache to hold that newborn, and I’d LOVE to get down on the floor and play dolls with your six-year-old. But I want to respect your autonomy as a parent to decide who watches, cuddles and holds your wonderful bundle of joy. but every piece of me is screaming that it’s something I would love. But I can not ask. I don’t think I could handle even a hesitant yes, and I know I couldn’t handle a no. So please, ask me, because right now I’m not strong enough to take those first toddling steps myself.