• So, who am I, anyway?

Life Unscripted

~ Living Life as I see it… or Don't

Life Unscripted

Category Archives: Book reviews

Book review: “Life’s Too Short to Go So F*cking Slow”, by Susan Lacke

16 Monday Aug 2021

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Nonfiction, Ultimate Blog Challenge

≈ 4 Comments

I know… it’s been a VERY long time since I’ve done a book review (more than three years, but who’s counting?) And I’m taking a step away from books with disability representation to write a review on a book about running… and cycling and swimming. And lest anyone think this is a book for athletes… you don’t need to be any kind of athlete to enjoy this book that is more about friendship than it is about sport.

About the book

They were unlikely friends. She was a young, overweight college professor with a pack-a-day habit and a bad attitude. He was her boss, and an accomplished Ironman triathlete. She was a whiner, he was a hardass. He had his shit together, she most assuredly did not. Yet Susan and Carlos shared a deep and abiding friendship that traversed life, sport, illness, death, and everything in between.
Amusing and poignant, Life’s Too Short To Go So F*cking Slow is about running and triathlon, growth and heartbreak, and an epic friendship that went the distance.

It’s ALMOST too Short

I nearly swallowed this audio book whole. Clocking in at just over three and a half hours, I read it for an hour and a half when I was too keyed up to sleep, half an hour on my way to work, and the last hour and a half at the end of my day. Even if you’re not a reader… it’s short! Read it!

All the Feels

I saw points of my own journey in this book (right down to having a loyal friend who, without fail, made sure I get out for Sunday morning workouts and post-workout coffee). The reminders of “EAT!” and “Don’t be a dumbass!” are phrases I’ve heard – in spirit, if not in words – from my friend and training partner (some of which I, like Susan, soundly ignore). There is much to make a reader laugh, and much to make them cry. This short little book is for anyone who’s ever done a race (any kind of race), anyone who’s had a loyal friend, or anyone who’s ever been challenged to do a thing that scares them.

The Bottom Line

I can’t say much about this book. It’s about racing, but not about racing. It’s about endurance sports, but more about an enduring friendship. It poignantly speaks of one 10-year friendship – the one that defies logic, but is the bedrock of a person’s life. It’s about showing up whenever and wherever you can, however you can. Towards the end of the book, Susan Lacke rights bluntly, “Pain is temporary. Anger is temporary. Sh*t shows are temporary.” I’ll take that nugget with me on my next long run with my good friend. And maybe, just maybe, I won’t be a dumbass.

5/5 stars.

Book Review: “The Gunners” by Rebecca Kauffman

30 Saturday Jun 2018

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Fiction

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

blindness, Book reviews, changes, denial, Fiction, friendship, Rebecca Kauffman, representation

I love books about friendship – the nostalgic type that brings back memories to the friends I had when I was young. Don’t get me wrong, I love my new and/or “adult” friends fiercely, but childhood or adolescent friends hold a special place in my heart.

And because I write reviews about representation of blindness in books, my selection for June seemed like a perfect fit.

Was I right?

 

Publisher’s Summary

 

Following her wonderfully received first novel, Another Place You’ve Never Been, called “mesmerizing,” “powerful,” and “gorgeous,” by critics all over the country, Rebecca Kauffman returns with Mikey Callahan, a thirty-year-old who is suffering from the clouded vision of macular degeneration. He struggles to establish human connections – even his emotional life is a blur.
As the novel begins, he is reconnecting with “The Gunners,” his group of childhood friends, after one of their members has committed suicide. Sally had distanced herself from all of them before ending her life, and she died harboring secrets about the group and its individuals. Mikey especially needs to confront dark secrets about his own past and his father. How much of this darkness accounts for the emotional stupor Mikey is suffering from as he reaches his maturity? And can The Gunners, prompted by Sally’s death, find their way to a new day? The core of this adventure, made by Mikey, Alice, Lynn, Jimmy, and Sam, becomes a search for the core of truth, friendship, and forgiveness.
A quietly startling, beautiful book, The Gunners engages us with vividly unforgettable characters, and advances Rebecca Kauffman’s place as one of the most important young writers of her generation.

 

Mikey’s Story – Mostly Loneliness

 

This story opens with an eye test. mikey, aged six or seven, cannot read all the letters on the eye chart. When he is told to cover the other eye to test that vision, he says he can’t, because that’s his “good eye.” When he comes home and talks to his father – who clearly loves him but is emotionally distant – he is told to never ever tell anyone about his failing vision.

And so he doesn’t.

Even as Mikey’s vision worsens – as he holds down a job, inherits a house, adopts a cat, cooks amazing dishes, drives around town – he never tells anyone about his vision loss. He attends doctor’s offices and gets stronger and stronger glasses, and he navigates his home and cooks his meals more and more frequently without vision.

But he does all of this alone.

And he never really makes any friends.

Not after the Gunners fell apart.

 

The Gunners – Bonds that Break…?

 

The strongest part of Kauffman’s writing is her depiction of friendship. In flashbacks to their childhoods, we see how the Gunners meet and become friends, how they grow up together, how they keep secrets from everyone around them, and then secrets from each other. When they return for Sally’s funeral – a sign that there is no reconciliation of the group as a whole – they eat and drink (all but Lynn, a recovering alcoholic, and Sam, a born-again Christian) and open their pasts and discover painful realizations… that the person you thought was keeping secrets may have been – but not the ones you thought they were. Does that make a difference?

 

The Messiness of Disclosure

 

This book unfolds slowly and beautifully. Without spoiling the plot, most of the characters come to a place where they need to open up about the deepest parts of themselves to truly be free. Whether coming out to parents, or disclosing vision loss, or telling the truth about family histories, there are scary points of vulnerability that changes the course of life.

This reader wishes the author had gone deeper with Mikey’s blindness, past the outward denials – I frequently forgot Mikey was going blind – to moments of self-pity (when Mikey says he’ll quit his job and get a dog and then… whatever) to relying on friends for practical needs (there is literally no mention of blindness services, at all). This quibble aside, this book, more than any I have read, shows the power of disclosure and the risks involved, and how those around you can treat you differently once they learn something they didn’t know before.

 

Conclusion

 

This book is well worth your time. It moves along slowly but powerfully, and I loved getting to know the characters – their secrets, their revelations, their futures. Mikey’s story could’ve so easily been written without blindness involved – it didn’t really add to the story, even if it became so integral to the ending – but as written it was handled with general sensitivity. The bonds of the past, reality of the present, and hope for the future are what carry this book above its pitfalls.

3.5/5 stars.

YOUR book Reviews: All about Guide Dogs

25 Wednesday Apr 2018

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Book reviews, guide dogs

I know, I know, book reviews are usually published at the end of the month.

But it’s almost the end of April… that counts right?

I’m publishing this blog post today because it’s International Guide Dogs Day!

 

I had a book review all ready to go today on the blog, and then I decided not to publish it – that whole nugget of wisdom “If you don’t have anything nice to say…” is applicable here. I realized that I didn’t want to commemorate this day with a blog post of a book that I found light, fluffy and aggravating in equal measure; there’s got to be more enjoyable books out there featuring guide dogs.

So, I’m coming to you, my readers…

What are some of your favorite reads featuring guide dogs? Are there some books that you recommend with caution? What about those that could be better?

If you’ve ever worked with a guide dog, known someone with a guide dog, or just love stories about dogs… chime in here!

I can’t wait to get some great recommendations!

 

Book review: “Carry On” by Lisa Fenn

31 Saturday Mar 2018

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Nonfiction

≈ 2 Comments

210209_0127Download

I first heard of this book during the lead-up to the 2016 Paralympic Games in Rio. Fellow blogger Beth Finke caught an interview with the author on NPR and used it as a launching point to discuss the wonder and beauty of cross-disability assistance. I know I’m late, but I decided to read this book during the leadup to the 2018 Paralympics. I was hooked!

Publisher’s Summary

In the spirit of The Blind Side and Friday Night Lights comes a tender and profoundly moving memoir about an ESPN producer’s unexpected relationship with two disabled wrestlers from inner city Cleveland and how these bonds – blossoming, ultimately, into a most unorthodox family – would transform their lives.

When award-winning ESPN producer Lisa Fenn returned to her hometown for a story about two wrestlers at one of Cleveland’s toughest public high schools, she had no idea that the trip would change her life. Both young men were disadvantaged students with significant physical disabilities. Dartanyon Crockett was legally blind as a result of Leber’s disease; Leroy Sutton lost both his legs at 11, when he was run over by a train. Brought together by wrestling, they had developed a brother-like bond as they worked to overcome their disabilities.

After forming a profound connection with Dartanyon and Leroy, Fenn realized she couldn’t just walk away when filming ended; these boys had had to overcome the odds too many times. Instead Fenn dedicated herself to ensuring their success long after the reporting was finished and the story aired – and an unlikely family of three was formed.

The years ahead would be fraught with complex challenges, but Fenn stayed with the boys every step of the way – teaching them essential life skills, helping them heal old wounds and traumatic pasts, and providing the first steady and consistent support system they’d ever had.

This powerful memoir is one of love, hope, faith, and strength – a story about an unusual family and the courage to carry on, even in the most extraordinary circumstances.

Lisa’s Story

This story is deeply personal. While it is interwoven with strong and sharp threads of Leroy’s and Dartanyon’s stories – and those of other key figures – this is Lisa’s story. From early childhood memories to blustering and fumbling her way to a dream job to high school wrestling matches and beyond, We get to know Lisa as a warm-hearted woman who yearns for a family. And she definitely gets her wish!

We’re introduced to athletes, to coaches, to parents and siblings. We laugh, we cry, and we hope and despair. But, make no mistake, this is Lisa’s story.

Sports – The Great Equalizer?

I’m not huge into wrestling, but Lisa’s writing puts the reader in school gyms, locker rooms, and world-class sports venues. You can definitely feel her respect for athletes in their own right, though there’s a strong undertone (sometimes voiced by coaches and observers and sometimes by Lisa herself) that athletes with disabilities are not talented in their own right… they’re talented “for a legless kid” (as someone referred to Leroy). The reactions to both young men – men of colour, living in poverty, and with disabilities – are almost exclusively related to their disabilities (as many of their peers are both people of colour and living in poverty); some are astounded that they can wrestle at all and use them as “inspirations”, others don’t want to challenge them out of fear or ignorance, and still others give them the respect of laying it all on the mat. And yet, it’s clear that wrestling – and Lisa and ESPN’s exposure – gave both Leroy and Dartanyon opportunities that they otherwise wouldn’t have had.

Disability as Inspiration or Tragedy

As much as I enjoyed this compelling read overall, I had a hard time escaping the prevailing theme that disability was something to be pitied or inspirationalized. In Lisa’s career as a sports editor, she interviewed athletes from all walks of life, including a hockey player who – years before the interview – became injured and paralyzed just seconds after stepping onto the ice during his first major game (you could almost hear the sad cellos playing in the background). Leroy and Dartanyon’s wrestling coach contacted the local newspaper to write a story about his two disabled wrestlers (clearly without consulting them); Lisa was unable to explain why she thought it was a story that needed national attention, but to her it was, so she dropped everything to fly back to her home city and interview these kids. When the resulting ESPN story aired, the resulting letters and responses left this reader with the distinct feeling that Leroy and Dartanyon were meant to be viewed as recipients of generosity and catalysts for people to look outside themselves, rather than talented athletes in their own rights.

And Yet…

No one can ignore the confluence of race, poverty, and disability, and how Leroy and Dartanyon’s families – neither of which were what many would consider “stable” – shaped their high school and college/university experiences. Dartanyon, in particular, frequently refused to be “pitied” as a blind guy, even though he could’ve made use of adapted services, because he didn’t want anyone to treat him differently. Leroy didn’t have the luxury of being able to blend in, but it is clear that his school and training environments are not well-equipped for many students (lack of uniforms and sports equipment) and definitely not set up with wheelchair-accessible buses or classrooms. It’s hard to look away from the reality that many cards are stacked against these young men’s lives and journeys. Lisa is tireless in her desire to provide for Leroy and Dartanyon, even as her adopted and biological family with her husband keeps growing. It’s heart-warming and frustrating and an important conversation – nature and nurture and empathy and personal responsibility. It made this reader uncomfortable, and maybe that’s a good thing.

Conclusion

This book is part memoir, part sports journey, part family history. There are some deeply uncomfortable mentions of ableism, racism, and inspiration porn (based on the depiction of the ESPN piece, “Carry On”, this reader has no desire to see it). And yet, this autobiography is compulsively readable, uplifting in places, and thought-provoking. It’s definitely worth the read.

3.5/5 stars.

Book Review: Girl, Stolen

28 Wednesday Feb 2018

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Fiction

≈ 3 Comments

It’s been a while since I read a novel featuring a blind protagonist. What with the holidays and busy work schedule and a TBR list that would take years to complete if I did nothing but read. But I promised to keep book reviews coming on this blog, and a short novel like “Girl, Stolen” seemed like a perfect place to get back into the swing of things.

Girl, Stolen

By: April Henry

 

Sixteen-year-old Cheyenne Wilder is sleeping in the back of a car while her mom fills her prescription for antibiotics. Before Cheyenne realizes what’s happening, their car is being stolen.
Griffin hadn’t meant to kidnap Cheyenne, but once his dad finds out that Cheyennes father is the president of a powerful corporation, everything changes – now there’s a reason to keep her.
How will Cheyenne survive this nightmare? Because she’s not only sick with pneumonia – she’s also blind.

 

Cheyenne

 

Cheyenne Wilder is a young woman who went blind in the same accident that killed her mother. The author does a generally admirable job of making her neither helpless and dependent nor otherworldly capable. She’s plucky and resourceful in some ways, frustrated and angry in others. There are far too many instances where Cheyenne fills the role of “helpful educator” – far too many to just be lulling Griffin into a false sense of security – but there are also poignant depictions of grief, frustration, and fear.

Cheyenne’s pneumonia seems to add an additional complication, until it’s dropped for reasons unknown (it doesn’t seem to really affect her mental capacity). As a blind reader, though, I’m glad the author chose to make Cheyenne emotionally and nuanced, with an additional “strike against” thrown in for good measure.

 

Some Plot Holes

 

It’s clear that April Henry did a lot of research on blind people. The skills many blind people learn – orientation and mobility, computer usage, life skills – are touched on with fairly good accuracy (though I wonder at the likelihood of a wealthy family sending a recently blinded teenage girl to train for these skills with middle-aged men). The stages of denial, grief, and frustration are well-drawn, but Griffin seemed too gullible and Cheyenne too resourceful given her weakened physical state. Also, the “bad guys” (with the exception of griffin) are drawn as big, angry and/or unintelligent, which made it hard for me to take them seriously. Also, to major corporations have presidents? I thought they had CEOS.

 

Light Read

 

There’s not a lot of heavy stuff in this book. In fact, there’s a lot more levity than expected. This is both a strength and a weakness. Most characters – human and canine – don’t act particularly believably in many spots, even while there are very poignant accurate portrayals.

 

Conclusion

 

It’s not a bad way to spend a few hours with Cheyenne and Griffin. Things tie up a little too neatly, but I found myself flipping through the pages. A little more research and less “education” might have made this a better read. But this reader found this book at just the right time.

3/5 stars.

Book Review: Sensing the Rhythm

31 Wednesday Jan 2018

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Nonfiction

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

deaf, disability, hearing loss, music

I first heard the name of Mandy Harvey when I read and reviewed Erik Weihenmayer’s latest autobiography, No Barriers. I first heard her sing a couple of months later in a heart-stopping video performance on America’s Got Talent. When I discovered not long afterward that she had written an autobiography of her own, I scooped it up quickly. As a disabled person myself, and an (albeit out-of-practice) musician, I was interested to hear the story behind the voice and the performance that made me stop and take immediate notice.

Sensing the Rhythm

Finding My Voice in a World Without Sound

By: Mandy Harvey and Mark Attberry

 

The inspiring true story of Mandy Harvey—a young woman who became deaf at age nineteen while pursuing a degree in music—and how she overcame adversity
and found the courage to live out her dreams.

When Mandy Harvey began her freshman year at Colorado State University, she could see her future coming together right before her eyes. A gifted musician
with perfect pitch, she planned to get a music degree and pursue a career doing what she loved. But less than two months into her first semester, she noticed
she was having trouble hearing her professors. In a matter of months, Mandy was profoundly deaf.

With her dreams so completely crushed, Mandy dropped out of college and suffered a year of severe depression. But one day, things changed. Mandy’s father
asked her to join him in their once favorite pastime—recording music together—and the result was stunningly beautiful. Mandy soon learned to sense the
vibrations of the music through her bare feet on a stage floor and to watch visual cues from her live accompaniment. The result was that she now sings
on key, on beat, and in time, performing jazz, ballads, and sultry blues around the country.

Full of inspiring wisdom and honest advice, Sensing the Rhythm is a deeply moving story about Mandy’s journey through profound loss, how she found hope
and meaning in the face of adversity, and how she discovered a new sense of passion and joy.

 

Initial Impressions

 

I chose to listen to this book in audio format, narrated by Mandy herself. Mandy’s narration lends additional warmth to her breezy, accessible style of writing. I was immediately transported to an unforgetable performance where, without words, all musicians knew exactly where to be and what to do.

We are taken on Mandy’s journey with her – from the rapid decrease in her hearing to her time of depression to her discovery that she could still sense the rhythm of music. I laughed and cried with Mandy, and some portions of her journey really made me think. Even though the publisher’s summary talks a lot about inspiration and overcoming adversity, I found this short book more approachable and relatable than I expected to.

At the end of each chapter, there’s a section called “Making Sense of Your Rhythm”, which I personally found repetative and the only real drawback to the book. These sections summarize – and sometimes re-state word-for-word – portions of the chapter that has just been read. There are some questions to ponder, but overall I didn’t find those portions useful (though perhaps a print or eBook would include space to write down reflections and answer additional questions).

 

Disability Identity

 

Mandy chooses to communicate using sign language, something she thought was important to use during her performance linked above. Her deafness is as much as part of herself as her musicianship, though she’s received threats from some in the deaf community. Her thoughts on using identity-first language – referring to someone as a “woman” or a “sister” or a “colleague” and then only including the disability identifier if it’s relevant to the discussion – almost completely changes the person/identity-first language debate on its head. Months later, I am will pondering the implications of including disability descriptors of people in my life in this way.

And yet I found myself feeling a complicated sense of sorrow and frustration when Mandy relates her experiences in early college as her hearing loss was progressing. She asked for an accommodation to learn an assignment and was denied that request. When students stood up for her, she admitted feeling like a burden, feeling uncomfortable, feeling like her hearing loss made her stand out. I found myself relating to and frustrated by her feelings of her disability experience and the reactions of those around her.

 

More than Disability

 

Yes, Mandy is deaf, and yes, she’s a musician. But she has some insights about life that are not exclusively disability-related. In particular, I found her formula for success to be an incredibly insightful look at talent and determination. Her hard-won insights on supporting a loved one through a life-changing event – based on what she found helpful and what she didn’t – may not be revolutionary, but they are told in a gentle and powerful way.

Mandy neither makes herself out to be a saint or a martyr, but as a woman who has made mistakes and chosen to learn from them. There are some portions of her book that some might find preachy (Mandy is a born-again Christian), but they are generally interwoven with her own lived experiences, adding to their tapestry rather than jutting out at odd angles.

 

Conclusion

 

I usually prefer longer books and getting to know characters and real people. But Sensing the Rhythm is a short tome that I’m glad I picked up. I personally would have liked to hear more about Mandy’s band, how she works with them, more about recording music as well as performing. And the “Sensing your Rhythm” portions don’t detract from the book, but they don’t add to it either.

It’s not a literary masterpiece, but it can be as easy or as profound as you, the reader, make it out to be.

Much like all of us.

 

4/5 stars.

Book Review: No barriers

31 Thursday Aug 2017

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Nonfiction

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

adventure, blindness, growing, learning lessons, mountains

Several months ago I reviewed Erik Weihenmayer’s first book, “Touch the Top of the World.” When I learned his second book (and continuation of his autobiography), “No Barriers“, was coming out earlier this year, I snapped it up quickly, and read it just as fast.

No Barriers: A Blind Man’s Journey to Kayak the Grand Canyon
By: Erik Weihenmayer

Erik Weihenmayer is the first and only blind person to summit Mount Everest, the highest point on Earth. Descending carefully, he and his team picked their way across deep crevasses and through the deadly Khumbu Icefall; when the mountain was finally behind him, Erik knew he was going to live. His expedition leader slapped him on the back and said something that would affect the course of Erik’s life: “Don’t make Everest the greatest thing you ever do.”
No Barriers is Erik’s response to that challenge. It is the moving story of his journey since descending Mount Everest – from leading expeditions around the world with blind Tibetan teenagers to helping injured soldiers climb their way home from war, from adopting a son from Nepal to facing the most terrifying reach of his life: to solo kayak the thunderous whitewater of the Grand Canyon.
Along the course of Erik’s journey, he meets other trailblazers – adventurers, scientists, artists, and activists – who, despite trauma, hardship, and loss, have broken through barriers of their own. These pioneers show Erik surprising ways forward that surpass logic and defy traditional thinking.
Like the rapids of the Grand Canyon, created by inexorable forces far beneath the surface, No Barriers is a dive into the heart and mind at the core of the turbulent human experience. It is an exploration of the light that burns in all of us, the obstacles that threaten to extinguish that light, and the treacherous ascent toward growth and rebirth.

Continuing the Journey, with New Friends along the Trail

This book re-introduces us to key people in Erik’s life – his father, his siblings, his wife and daughter. We get to know and see some of their dynamics play out, discover their demons some kept at bay (and later taking over), grow and change with everyone. One thing that the author has done well – in both books – is balance interpersonal dynamics without verging far into sappy emotional supposition or stale dialogue re-creation.
In addition to getting re-acquainted with Erik’s family, we meet new key people in his life. We meet his son, who is sweet and precocious and is too young to express his grief at being taken far away from the only life, country and culture he’s ever known. The challenges of culture shock when adopting a child from a foreign country (and the bureaucracy that goes with it can almost be felt by the reader; I can only imagine what it felt like going through it at the time. And so many people were instrumental in building this relationship – on both sides of the world.
We also meet other disabled people – from sheltered blind children who learn they were capable of doing more than they thought possible, to veterans who struggled through their own mental and physical barriers to climb mountains, to doctors and adventurers and entrepreneurs and bureaucrats and kayaking guides… Erik’s books are always about people; I never once came away with the idea that Erik was this big hot shot who’s done all these cool things, but he had others with him every step of the way.

A Few Too Many Rabbit Trails

Unlike “Touch the Top of the World”, “No barriers” is a long book with many components to it. We travel up a Tibetan mountain with blind teenagers, learn about the BrainPort (a nifty piece of technology that produces visual information on the wearer’s tongue, laugh and cry at the journey of creating a new family, experience the merger between two nonprofits and the pitfalls along the way… it’s all useful and important, but at times I just wanted to get back to Erik’s journeys as an adventurer – climbing mountains, kayaking rivers – or reading more about his family. “Touch the Top” was a much tighter and more cohesive read, but I do understand why all these components were included, to describe a journey of peaks and valleys, of falling down and getting back up again.

Seeing the Forest for the Trees

One of the most profound experiences in the book is not when Erik kayaks the Grand Canyon (though that experience is well-described and riveting), but when he trains and takes a small group of blind Tibetan teenagers and their guides to Tibet’s tallest mountain. Erik is put in touch with Sabriye Tenberken, a blind German social worker who founded Braille Without Borders, a school and training center for the blind of Tibet. Eventually they decide that, both as an educational experience for the teenagers and as a way to break down barriers placed on them by Tibetan society, a mountain climbing trip is in order. Erik is a goal setter – he has a plan, and he is going to achieve it, making adjustments along the route but with the understanding that achieving the goal (in this case, climbing the mountain) is the most desirable end result. But when threatening weather adds further danger to this trek, Erik and Sabriye have vastly different opinions on whether or not to proceed.

Sabriye, affter thoughtful consideration, tells Erik that she has taken what he’s told her to heart, that she needs to respect the mountains and their beauty. She tells him bluntly but kindly that she’s noticed the sound of the wind in the trees, the feel of the glaciers, the stillness of the air. She has done what he’s asked, to appreciate the mountains for all that they offer, but it’s his turn to do what she’s asked and respect their people enough to acknowledge that they’ve already done more than they could’ve ever imagined, and now it’s time to keep them safe.

I read this book months ago, and Sabriye’s idea (though paraphrased here) has never left me. Goals are important, but sometimes we focus so much on the end result that we miss the little things along the way.

Conclusion

This book is well worth your time – at a sprawling 480 print pages and more than 19 recorded hours, it will take a lot of it. It’s profound and moving in ways I didn’t expect. That being said, some passages could have been shortened for a more cohesive read.

4/5 stars.

Book Review: Love and First Sight

30 Friday Jun 2017

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Fiction

≈ 5 Comments

I picked up this book during a period when I needed something light to read. Something very very light.

And I’m not really sure that’s what I got.

 

Love and First Sight

By: Josh Sundquist

In his debut novel, YouTube personality and author of We Should Hang Out Sometime Josh Sundquist explores the nature of love, trust, and romantic attraction.

On his first day at a new school, blind 16-year-old Will Porter accidentally groped a girl on the stairs, sat on another student in the cafeteria, and
somehow drove a classmate to tears. High school can only go up from here, right?

As Will starts to find his footing, he develops a crush on a charming, quiet girl named Cecily. Then an unprecedented opportunity arises: an experimental
surgery that could give Will eyesight for the first time in his life. But learning to see is more difficult than Will ever imagined, and he soon discovers
that the sighted world has been keeping secrets. It turns out Cecily doesn’t meet traditional definitions of beauty – in fact everything he’d heard about
her appearance was a lie engineered by their so-called friends to get the two of them together. Does it matter what Cecily looks like? No, not really.
But then why does Will feel so betrayed?

Told with humor and breathtaking poignancy, Love and First Sight is a story about how we relate to each other and the world around us.

 

What I Loved

As I read this book in audio format, I loved the narrator. he became Will. With the exception of a really horrible Italian accent for one of the characters, the narrator’s characterization was superb. As for the book itself, I’m thankful that Will is not a loner – he hangs out with the super-smart kids – and he’s a practical joker (as evidenced by Will’s response when he is asked to touch someone’s face). The author did an amazing job of recreating a situation where someone is treated differently because they are blind, but he doesn’t leave it there, showing Will (and us) that some people do “get it.” Will also seems to possess a certain amount of awareness about himself and the world around him, and yet he wants to be able to conceptualize visual information when he meets Cecily, whose photography hobby is a foreign world to him.  This book does ask important questions about vision, autonomy, independence, helicopter parents, even though I found myself vastly disagreeing with its conclusions.

 

But Mooooooooom!

I could devote an entire blog post to the real-life counterparts to Will’s mother. She is the embodiment of a helicopter parent. Mom packs Will’s lunch every day, braille labeling the containers, wanting to hover at every opportunity. She insists that he wear big dark sunglasses to school (unlike some more stylish options he can wear), and Will just seems to go along with it after he freaks out Cecily by unintentionally staring at her.

This meddling is not new. As a young boy, when another child takes advantage of Will’s inability to see, instead of teaching Will how to handle that situation, his parents ship him off to a school for the blind. Ten years later, Will is trying to find his way, and his mother is smothering him… until, suddenly, she isn’t? And Will realizes that her hovering is preparing him for independence? And we’re all somewhat dependent on each other? Um… what?

The Disability Cure Trope

When Will begins to regain his vision, his confusion and exhaustion are obvious. The author does a great job of describing in general how exhausting it is for a brain to completely re-wire itself to process things differently. However, unlike Mike May in “Crashing Through”, Will’s parents do the initial leg work with him and his identifying of objects. I had a hard time with the disability-cure-leads-to-happiness idea, particularly since Will was never certain he wanted the operation to begin with, and the idea that Mom and Dad are teaching him to “see” just rang hollow and like the author didn’t feel like doing some research.

Speaking of Research

There were some truly cringe-worthy research blunders in this book. For example, Voiceover reads textx, not Siri. While in some ways the author adequately described the dynamics at a school for the blind, and the frustrations of electric cars, he also completely misnamed someone who teaches the blind to navigate as an “Orienteering and mobility guide.” One of Will’s friends wants to help him and Cecily deliver the morning announcements at school, does a bit of research, and asks Will if he’s heard of a refreshable braille display (Will has, but doesn’t have one). Buddy is able to procure one (something that costs thousands of dollars) in a matter of just a couple of days, and he (not Will) is the one to set it up. A little research would have gone a long way to making this book so much better… but as a fun aside… Do Scratch ‘n Sniff stickers come in gasoline and smelly socks?

 

Conclusion

The above paragraphs sound like I hated the book. In fact, I didn’t hate it at all. I had a really hard time with some ideas within, and I’m always very frustrated if an author decides not to do their homework. But it’s a fun way to spend some time, and it’s written in an engaging style that made me smile. I grew to love Will and Cecily and their friends. Even Will’s Dad grew on me. Take a ride with Will, Cecily and their friends; it’s a mildly wild one.

3/5 stars.

Have you read this book or any of the others I’ve reviewed? Leave a comment in their comment sections, and let’s chat about it!

Book Review: Eyes Wide Open

31 Wednesday May 2017

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Nonfiction

≈ Leave a comment

Over the past few months, I seem to have found myself reading books on self-improvement (working on sales skills, overcoming rejection). And biographies and autobiographies of people with disabilities (because we are all on a similar journey with many paths). A few months ago, I read a terrific article about taking a step back and trying not to read someone else’s intentions and the importance of communicating effectively. When I discovered the author of the article wrote a book, I snapped it up quickly, hoping to be able to learn a few things. I did, but not in the way I expected.

 

Eyes Wide Open

By: Isaac Lidsky

In this New York Times bestseller, Isaac Lidsky draws on his experience of achieving immense success, joy, and fulfillment while losing his sight to a blinding disease to show us that it isn’t external circumstances, but how we perceive and respond to them, that governs our reality.
Fear has a tendency to give us tunnel vision–we fill the unknown with our worst imaginings and cling to what’s familiar. But when confronted with new challenges, we need to think more broadly and adapt. When Isaac Lidsky learned that he was beginning to go blind at age thirteen, eventually losing his sight entirely by the time he was twenty-five, he initially thought that blindness would mean an end to his early success and his hopes for the future. Paradoxically, losing his sight gave him the vision to take responsibility for his reality and thrive. Lidsky graduated from Harvard College at age nineteen, served as a Supreme Court law clerk, fathered four children, and turned a failing construction subcontractor into a highly profitable business.
Whether we’re blind or not, our vision is limited by our past experiences, biases, and emotions. Lidsky shows us how we can overcome paralyzing fears, avoid falling prey to our own assumptions and faulty leaps of logic, silence our inner critic, harness our strength, and live with open hearts and minds. In sharing his hard-won insights, Lidsky shows us how we too can confront life’s trials with initiative, humor, and grace.

 

Autobiography

You learn early on that Isaac Lidsky has lived an exceptional life for someone who hasn’t yet turned 40. he’s starred in a hit TV show, clerked for not one, but two, Supreme Court Justices, owns his own company, and is a father of four.
The autobiographical portion of this book is told in “fishing Trips”, lighthearted reads, non-sequential essays. You know his wife gives birth to triplets and health problems arise, but you learn this in the early stages of the book, and don’t learn the outcome until closer to the end. His taking over a struggling construction company is detailed first, then, the next “Fishing Trip” essay is about a threat to his employer (a Supreme Court Justice) three years earlier that included his taking a motorcade to a cigar bar. The autobiography is compulsively readable, but it’s hard to follow, because it’s not written in any linear fashion.

 

Journey Through Sight Loss

 

From teen heartthrob to law clerk to entrepreneur, Isaac Lidsky has worked hard to get where he’s at, but he had to first come to terms with his declining vision. He believes that he would not be the person he is today without having lost his vision. When addressing his own journey to sight loss acceptance, he uses terms such as “awfulizing” (considering and brooding on a worst-case scenario). He acknowledges that many people view losing their sight as terrifying – he was once one of them – but likens it to a child who fears a monster under the bed and has to be told again and again that there are no monsters. His way of expressing his own journey through sight loss – from denial to resignation to acceptance – is refreshing; he acknowledges that he has to remind himself that others are where he once was, and needs to take that step back and allow them to fear the “monster” of sight loss and learn the truth about the “monsters.”

 

Self-Help: Eyes Wide Open

 

The self-help aspects of the book were where most of my conflict lies. There’s not a lot new here, though some of the analogies put into great words things I’ve never been able to express. Everyone has had an experience where they knew they saw a neighbor, an acquaintance, or a coworker somewhere… only to call their name and discover it’s not them. Heck, even someone who knows me had a similar experience. Lidsky uses this universal experience to drive home the point that perception is not reality, and we would do well to remember that.

But what is most troubling is his assertion that life is what you make it, that people will misjudge you but it’s up to you to not allow their perceptions of you to colour your perception of yourself, or of them. This glosses over the very real problems of ableism, racism, sexism that exist in our world. And being grateful that we can read and write, and live on more than $10 a day, doesn’t address very real obstacles that are placed in our path. Lidsky compares life to a game of poker – of skill rather than luck. Yes, what you do and how you respond to challenges matters – and it matters a lot – but constantly receiveing horrible cards puts you in a situation where you’re supposed to bluff your way through life, or you’re so far in the hole that no amount of skill can get you ahead in the next 27 hands.

 

Conclusion

 

Isaac Lidsky has lived a remarkable life. He has worked hard to get where he is, and I would never presume to take that away from him. But in many ways he has been given remarkable gifts of a superior intillect, a supportive family, and a drive to succeed in his chosen career and academic fields. For those who simply want a “normal” life, his advice can lead one to feel that their ordinary dreams are not good enough. The “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” ideas can make those who’ve faced very real ableism, sexism or racism feel marginalized all over again because we “let” someone else get to us and relied on luck rather than skill to dictate the course of our education or career or life.

I’m struggling to rate this book fairly, because I think it tried to be too many things to too many people. As an essayist, I like the way Isaac Lidsky expresses himself. But as a hole, I struggled to read this book straight through. Even picking apart the well-written personal essays – by turns humorous and heartbreaking – I would’ve preferred a more sequential reading. And the self-help “eyes wide open” philosophy – even though it contained some portions that will make me think – doesn’t address some very real problems that do have very real consequences. Yes, we need to step back and ask questions and listen actively, but Lidsky’s glossing over one’s perception of him as a blind man (because, frankly, he has the economic luxury to do so) and encouraging others to do the same, rings quite hollow.

Even so, this book will make you think; it will challenge you. It challenged me in some important ways.

3/5 stars.

Book Review: Britt-Marie was here

31 Friday Mar 2017

Posted by blindbeader in Book reviews, Fiction

≈ 5 Comments

I first heard of the Swedish author Fredrik Backman when Audible had his first novel, “A Man Called Ove”, on a Daily Deal. It was such a charm of a novel that I eagerly snapped up every other book he’d written that had been translated into English. Backman has a knack of fleshing out characters, giving them nuance with turns of phrase that make you laugh out loud or stop in your tracks because that’s absolutely 100% how you feel.

“Britt-Marie was Here” spins off from Backman’s previous novel, “My Grandmother Asked me to Tell you She’s Sorry”. While I read both books, Britt-Marie was here stands sturdily on its own two feet.

About the Book

 

From the best-selling author of the “charming debut” (People) A Man Called Ove and My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She’s Sorry, a heartwarming and hilarious story of a reluctant outsider who transforms a tiny village and a woman who finds love and second chances in the unlikeliest of places.
Britt-Marie can’t stand mess. She eats dinner at precisely the right time and starts her day at six in the morning because only lunatics wake up later than that. And she is not passive-aggressive. Not in the least. It’s just that sometimes people interpret her helpful suggestions as criticisms, which is certainly not her intention.
But at 63, Britt-Marie has had enough. She finally walks out on her loveless 40-year marriage and finds a job in the only place she can: Borg, a small, derelict town devastated by the financial crisis. For the fastidious Britt-Marie, this new world of noisy children, muddy floors, and a roommate who is a rat (literally) is a hard adjustment.
As for the citizens of Borg, with everything that they know crumbling around them, the only thing that they have left to hold on to is something Britt-Marie absolutely loathes: their love of soccer. When the village’s youth team becomes desperate for a coach, they set their sights on her. She’s the least likely candidate, but their need is obvious, and there is no one else to do it.
Thus begins a beautiful and unlikely partnership. In her new role as reluctant mentor to these lost young boys and girls, Britt-Marie soon finds herself becoming increasingly vital to the community. And, even more surprisingly, she is the object of romantic desire for a friendly and handsome local policeman named Sven. In this world of oddballs and misfits, can Britt-Marie finally find a place where she belongs?
Zany and full of heart, Britt-Marie Was Here is a novel about love and second chances and about the unexpected friendships we make that teach us who we really are and the things we are capable of doing.

 

It Takes a Village

 

This book is not about soccer (football, I know, but I’m Canadian, okay?). Yes, soccer is played, talked about, argued over, disdained and loved. But this book is not about soccer as much as it is about Borg, the charming, economically depressed town where (to paraphrase one character) you don’t have the luxury to choose your best friend, because even if he’s a criminal he’s the one who helped carry your brother on his back to escape your abusive father. No one is as they seem  – in all the right ways. The community comes together to support the soccer team, not just because it’s soccer (though everyone but Britt-marie loves football), but because it’s all about supporting Borg… and don’t you dare mention that team from “town.”

 

More than One Disabled Character

 

There’s much disability representation in this book. It’s clear that Britt-Marie lives with OCD – compulsive list-taking, cleaning, etc. When I started reading this book, I got incredibly frustrated with the frequent repetitions and rationalizations, until I took a step back and realized that Backman was getting inside Britt-marie’s head – things had to be done a certain way, because there’s no other way to do them.

Other characters use wheelchairs or are blind, and are in various stages on the journey to disability-acceptance. I grew frustrated with the fact that we never know the wheelchair user’s name (“Somebody”), and yet I wonder if it stems from Britt-marie’s thought process of first impressions or memories continuing to colour their interactions.

Borg, overall, seems to be accessible for “Somebody” to move in her wheelchair. She runs the pizzeria/post office/hospital/whatever, doing what needs doing to help keep the town going. It’s clear she has a massive drinking problem, but whether that’s disability or economically related, I couldn’t say. She’s plucky and resourceful and very comfortable with who she is, and as a character (though I never knew her name) I adored her.

 

Bank: “I’m not BLIND… I’m Visually Impaired”

 

Bank is not a major player in Britt-Marie’s story, but she plays a crucial role. She is losing her vision as an adult, and based on her overall grouchy demeanor, she does not appear to have come to a place of acceptance. Bank goes around town with a walking stick that she pokes or hits people with at various convenient opportunities, and totes around a little dog (though very clearly stating that it’s not a guide dog, it’s just a dog). Her home is filthy, and Britt-Marie suspects it’s because she can’t see it, but Bank cooks for herself and travels throughout the small town with a walking cane – not a white cane – because of a bad leg.

Bank played soccer as a youth and was really really good, and – vision or not – when she gets a chance to be an official coach of the Borg team for the upcoming indoor cup, she throws her history into the faces of officials that believe the team is useless. She doesn’t listen to anyone who thinks she can’t do something because she can’t see (though in Borg that’s very few people), but quietly and grumpily and with pluck just goes out and does them.

The reader in me finds her character fascinating and nuanced. The blind person in me, however, is extremely conflicted by Backman’s choices for her. Britt-marie points out to Bank where all the former soccer pictures were hung on her walls while thinking that she keeps a dirty house because of course she can’t see it. And I cringed at Bank’s “accidental” pokes and swats with her stick – in front of a policeman, no less.

 

Conclusion

 

I love the author’s way of turning individuals’ quirks into strengths, of cracking open the shells of people who annoyed me with their habits or attitudes. But everyone has wisdom to share if you just look for it. With a few hiccups along the way, Britt-Marie was here shows just how much we all can impact each other by simply being there.

3.5/5 stars.

← Older posts

Subscribe

  • Entries (RSS)
  • Comments (RSS)

Archives

  • December 2025
  • January 2024
  • December 2023
  • April 2023
  • January 2023
  • December 2022
  • October 2022
  • June 2022
  • April 2022
  • January 2022
  • December 2021
  • October 2021
  • August 2021
  • June 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • February 2021
  • January 2021
  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • April 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • September 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014

Categories

  • Blind Lady Gets Sh*t Done
  • blindness
    • My Sorta Kinda Maybe (In)accessible Life
  • Book reviews
    • Fiction
    • Nonfiction
  • Epic Road Trip of Awesome
  • Exploring Edmonton
  • Finance Friday
  • Guide Dog 2.0
  • New York vacation
  • The Empowered Series
  • The Intrepid Journey 2018
  • Ultimate Blog Challenge
  • Ultimate Blog Challenge, Part 2
  • Ultimate Blog Challenge, Part 3
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Create account
  • Log in

Support my blog!

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

What’s gotten folks talking?

RoseQuartz's avatarRoseQuartz on If you Had Told Me…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on If you Had Told Me…
Annie Chiappetta's avatarAnnie Chiappetta on If you Had Told Me…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide Dog 2.0: One Year L…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide Dog 2.0, One Year Later:…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide dog 2.0, One Year Later:…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide Dog 2.0, One Year Later:…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide Dog 2.0, One Year Later:…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide Dog 2.0, One Year Later:…
Carol anne's avatarCarol anne on Guide Dog 2.0, One Year Later:…

Enter your email address here and receive new posts by email!

Join 207 other subscribers

Blog at WordPress.com.

  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Life Unscripted
    • Join 207 other subscribers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Life Unscripted
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar